Here they are in (as they say on Dancing with the Stars) no particular order.
A. Have you folks seen the new Volvo commercial on TV? It starts out with a guy driving along and saying,"Afoot and lighthearted, I take to the open road." So, I say to myself,"AFOOT, really?" You see, I was curious about the seeming incongruity of opening a car commercial about whizzing along the highway with a word that, according to Webster, means on foot; traveling or moving on one's feet (or taking the shoe leather express as we used to say). So, I wrote an email to Volvo asking if they have someone in the advertising department who speaks English or do they only operate in Swedish? I got a response that The Volvo Team was considering my comment and would provide an answer in 24 hours. They didn't! I waited for 5 days and then called them. The young lady I spoke to insisted that using "afoot" in a car commercial is OK because Volvo was using the word in its third definition. To wit: "In a state of preparation". She could not tell me what the guy in the car is preparing for but it must be something good because he has a nice, clean and shiny car.
B. On "Wheel of Fortune" the other night a lady won a "Scandinavian Vacation". In telling the woman about her prize, the announcer said she would take in the wonders of Norway, Stockholm and Copenhagen. Great, I thought, but why would they specify a country and two cities instead of listing either the three countries or the three capitals for consistency's sake? Maybe, I thought, they feared that people wouldn't know that Oslo is in Norway. Indeed, judging from the winner's reaction to the description of her trip, I think the show's producers may have had good reason to harbor such fears. Because, until the announcer mentioned Norway and the cities to be visited, she clearly had no clue as to what or where "Scandinavia" was!
C. Last week, Dez Bryant a wide receiver for the Dallas Cowboys announced that he would not watch the Super Bowl because the Cowboys are not in it. That's a shame because he could have used to opportunity to get some snacks and settle in front of the TV at his mom's house. You remember his mom don't you? She's the person Dez was arrested for assaulting in 2012. Old Jerry Jones only hires really classy guys! But back to the Super Bowl and Dez's boycotting of it (rather like a democratic house member after the last election, with the attitude that "my team lost so I'm taking my marbles and going home." Anyway, re: The Big Game, it has apparently not occurred to Dez that even if the Cowboys were in the Super Bowl, he couldn't watch it anyway because he'd be on the field where he'd have no chance to see the game as one would on TV! That Jerry Jones guy demands that his players be smart too!
D. It was also rumored this week that Hillery Clinton, having finished (at least for a while) with campaigning for public office, is considering hosting a liberal TV talk show as her first major post-election undertaking. I'd very much like to see that and have a suggestion for what to call the show. Assuming a performance at least equal in charm and wide audience connection to her last two Presidential campaigns, HRC should dub the program "Strike Three".
And finally,
E. Yesterday, I heard on a radio news slot that scientists have successfully produced a viable embryo which contains both human and pig DNA. Now, these guys in the labs are all over the moon about the possibility of being able to generate, from pigs, human organs suitable for transplant and, thus, save thousands of lives. For my part, I'm mostly excited because it seems to me that this breakthrough makes bringing Miss Piggy to life a real possibility. Kermit will be so happy!
TH....TH....Th....THAT'S ALL FOLKS....